Freshmen are babies now… and other things that make me feel old

When I got to college I quickly fell in with a group of other freshmen honor students. We had lots of fun and thought that we were adults. We looked up to the junior and senior honor students that we hung out with sometimes. We called them the Bigs.

I am one of the Bigs now.

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I had this realization the other day while listening to some freshmen discussing one of their classes. They were complaining about a class called Biblical Worldview. They thought it was hard.

*Laughs maniacally*

For context, when I got my concussion two years ago, I wrote a paper for that class that I actually don’t remember writing. I got an A. I’m a pretty smart cookie, but it’s not an exaggeration to say that you can pass that class with half your brain tied behind your back.

But these freshmen were telling each other how different it was from high school and how much harder it was. All I could think was, “Oh you sweet summer child.” They have no idea what they’re getting into.

I keep wanting to sit down every freshman that I see and tell them all the mistakes I made and how to avoid them. I want to hug them and tell that everything is going to be okay, that they’ll get used to this, even though it’s hard. I guess what I’m saying is that freshmen are giving me maternal instincts I didn’t know existed.

The other thing that freaks me out a bit is that kids that I worked with when they were eight and nine are on Facebook talking about exams in high school. It’s hard for me not to keep seeing them as the fuzzy-headed little cuties that would run up to me and hug me around the waist because that’s all they could reach.


Is this what getting older feels like? If so, I don’t like it. I want to go back to when my biggest worry was whether or not I would manage to finish my two page Evangelism paper in time to go see a concert.

Forget all this internship searching and worrying about my future nonsense.


Highs and Lows

My life feels a bit like a roller coaster right now. Up, down, up, left, right, up, down. The good news is that I like roller coasters. I tend to do very well under ridiculous amounts of stress. Still, I’m looking forward to the summer. I’ll have 9 days at the end of the semester before I have to pack up and go to camp. Hopefully they’ll be 9 lazy days.

The first high of the last week or so was that I finished my video project for my honors psychology class and it looked pretty cool. My partners loved it, and I liked it. Probably could have done a bit more work on the sound, but it was a psychology class, not a production class. My low for this one is that the professor still hasn’t graded it a week later. I really hate waiting for grades. It just hangs a weight of stress around my neck that won’t go away until I get the grade.

Next, I’ve got my video production class, where the biggest project will be due in like a week and a half. My team (yeah, a team project totally makes everything easier) is doing fine for time, but it’s hard to get everything done when we’re trying to work around everyone’s hectic schedule. So that class is equal parts exhilarating and terrifying.

I’m in the same boat for my audio class. I have another team final project that is due at final exam time. I’m not as worried about this one as in the video class, but it’s just another thing to try not to worry too much about. I haven’t had the chance to study for the final exam too much in this class, so that’s not helping matters.

Of course, there’s the big high of the week. I released my new short story on Amazon a few days ago for only $0.99. As of this writing, a total of 8 people have bought my book. I can’t tell you how happy that makes me. People actually paid money to read something that I wrote. Cool.

On a slightly lower note, I had a friend come up to me last week and ask if I could help her with a biology project that apparently needed filming. I told her sure, if I was available. It seems that I am. Hopefully, I can do what she needs me to. I’m not the greatest of cinematographers, but I think I can help her out.

Like most college students around this time of the year, I’m tired most of the time. I’ve never been able to sleep well, and now I have run out of my usual sleep aids. I’m trying to get to bed earlier, but I’ve got so much to do that I haven’t been able to.

Up, down, left, up, down, up. It’s crazy right now, but the end is in sight. I just have to hang on for three more weeks, and then I’ll have a little break.

And then it’s off to summer camp and a whole new bag of highs and lows.

EDIT: I completely forgot another area of stress. I’m busy trying to deal with finding an apartment with two of my friends. We’ve already settled on a place, so now we’re trying to finalize things and make sure we did everything right. Sheesh. Adulting is hard.


Have you read my short story yet? What? No? Well go read it!

It’s FREE for those with Kindle Unlimited and only $0.99 for everyone else. Click here to buy it

The Lifeguard Cover

I’m a College Girl Now!

Sorry, that it’s been a while since I’ve posted. I’ve been incredibly busy these last few weeks. I was packing and shopping and trying on every article of clothing I own, but now I’m done. I have finally begun my very first year of college away from home.

So far, it’s been a lot of fun. I began my first class at Liberty University this Monday at 8:50am. Currently, I am undeclared, but that’s only because I’m not allowed to apply for the individualized study program that I want to enter until I’ve been here a semester, despite the fact that I’m technically a sophomore (I’ve been calling myself a freshmore: sophomore by credit freshman by year). At the end of this semester, I will begin working toward my individualized studies degree, focusing on creative writing (duh) and probably communications.

A lot has happened this first week. For starters, I accidentally walked into the wrong classroom for the first class of my Honors CINE 101. Then I stayed the whole time. I’m not sure why it didn’t occur to me that I was in the wrong class. There were so many hints. For example, the professor called the class by a different name than the one I signed up for. I did, however, get it straightened out the second class.

I’ve also been battling a back injury that I’m pretty sure was caused by the repetitive shirt on/shirt off motion that I had to do when I was trying on my clothes to see what I would take with me. I never before realized how many shirts I had. I’ve been using a rolling backpack to keep stress off my spine. I’m currently one of only two people on campus that I know of that uses a rolling backpack. I feel like an utter dork, and I keep running over people’s toes. I cannot wait until my back is back to normal.

And then I got sick on Tuesday. Yep, that’s right, I got a cold on my First. Week. Of. College. It stinks about as much as it sounds. My roommates are getting a little peeved at the constant coughing in the night. Quite honestly, so am I. I hate being sick.

It’s not all bad. I am really enjoying some of my classes. In case you’re curious, my classes are English 201 (American literature), University 101 (that same annoying class that they make every freshman or transfer take), Honors Cinema Appreciation 101 (we watch movies and then talk about them like smart people), Psychology of Relationships (ugh), Honors History of Western Civilization (we read about history and then talk about it like smart people), and Biblical Worldview (we learn about, uh, a Biblical worldview?).

I’m fairly certain that I’m going to enjoy most of my classes, notable exceptions being the psychology and University 101 classes. Psychology has never really been my thing. I’m not really into looking deep into my soul and head-shrinking other people. The University 101 class feels unneeded, but who knows, maybe I’ll learn something that I didn’t already know from basically self-teaching myself since I was in 7th grade and taking two years of college classes at home. Maybe.

How’s your week been? Are any of you going back to school? Have you gone back already? Or are you done entirely and thrilled about it?